ANNOUNCEMENT

Unfortunately I am once again having problems with blogger, the same problem has occurred on two of my blogs now so I've decided to move this blog over to wordpress. It seems to be a better platform for me and am really enjoying it over there so I hope you'll join me.
You can now find me here: www.alxeen.wordpress.com

Sorry guys but thanks for sticking with me
xxx

quote of the week #1

I wanted to start sharing a quote with you guys once a week, Sundays. Since I find them helpful and there's so many out there, it would be nice to have an archive of ones I really like. Today I discovered the work of Alan Watts, I don't know how I had never heard of this man before. I'm definitely in at the right place in my life to hear his work and it really strikes a cord with me. In the talks I have listened to so far he talks a lot about what is your desire, your passion? What do you really want to do in life? Seeing this video after my post about Ben Howard earlier has given me even more to think about. It's very common sense but does really get you thinking. Let me know if you like this idea and share any good quotes/ quote websites in the comments. Hope you are all having a lovely weekend. 

questioning my passion

I got the absolute pleasure to see Ben Howard at Brixton Academy this Wednesday, he was so completely immersed in his music and so passionate about it, truly living in the moment, which made it amazing. Words can't do what he did justice, it was as if his life depended on making every note. There was so much emotion in the room,  I've never seen, heard, felt anything like it. His performance sparked something in me that made me realise I don't have a passion and when talking about finding ourselves, it's really about finding our passions. I've known what I'm doing is not what I'm passionate about for a long time and it has just been confirmed that what I'm really doing is searching for it. It's just sparked some things for me to think about.

why hypocrite is a ridiculous word

Nowadays everyone is a hypocrite. For years this word has been thrown around like it ain't no thang. It seems like the definition of hypocrite has widened to include anyone who ever changes their mind, rewords something they say or just sees something in a different way than they did before. Also apparently being a 'hypocrite' makes you a bad 'insert relationship here' but why? Are we not allowed to change our minds anymore? I didn't realise we were so afraid of change that we don't allow others to change and develop in their lives.  So what if I change my opinion, I don't see how that effects you one bit and if it does you care far too much about other people's lives than your own. My thoughts and opinions change everyday and I revel in it; I should be questioning everything and changing all the time, what's the use in being stuck in our ways and never seeing what is really out there in the world. It seems like people think their identity revolves around their never changing opinions, sports supporters for example, even if their opinion on a team changes they still stick with them because they identify with that team now, they are a West Ham supporter to the end, no matter what. Maybe not wanting people to be 'hypocritical' is a defence mechanism for their identity, which they are desperately trying to hold on to. Not thinking differently and being stuck in our ways cuts off all kinds of possibilities and opportunities in life. Even if people aren't happy with their lives they wont change anything because radical change makes you look like a 'hippy weirdo'.We should embrace change and be happy that we can, we have so many options in life, take them.
I hate the word hypocrite because I think it's evolved to mean more than it means. It's a word which promotes no change, no development and in a round about way, no happiness. It's also a word people care about, it has a sigma that says 'you are a bad people' and a majority care to much about what other people think that they never change, in order to please other people and avoid this sigma.
I suppose this is a round about way of me saying, don't expect me to constantly have the same opinions all the time, they will evolve and I want to explore every avenue. I want to be as real as possible here, I don't really proof read, I write in the flow and don't care whether it's good or not. Don't take what I say too seriously, this is just a conversation about my thoughts and realisations and hopefully yours two. This is kind of my journal for you all to possibly get something from. I'm just brainstorming here.

in my ears

I finally got around to checking out the new Two Door Cinema Club album this week and I can't stop listening to it. They're a band I could listen to all the time and I played their previous album to death. I'm especially liking the song Sun from the new album, I just makes me happy and I want to dance around to it.